change, change, change. it's coming like a train engine.
culmination. school's ending. it's hard to find focus and the energy for these last reflection-based homework assignments. i'm submitting the same piece for two classes. something i never wanted to do. but, my vision kept getting blurry when staring at the screen tonight. and friday when i met with my mentor, we cut our session short after a half-hearted discussion. i know i should and want to be wringing this stone, but the fatigue surrounds me.
"i'm too tired to be sentimental," i told my teacher last monday. the one who guided me since our first meeting two years ago. if we both weren't locked in our little secret spaces, i'd hug her more. a few hours after our meeting, i realized that school was ending in two weeks and the sentimentality set it. it's forcing me to think about classmates that are moving. about the loss of a daily destination. the shift in conversations. things even seem to be molting in my work life. i try to remind myself that change can be a good thing. it's what got me to this point. it's the only avenue for new good to arrive.
but, it's also a world of unknown. and some loss. and some sadness. but, mostly i just want to sleep right now.